I cannot count the cost
The price that has been paid
Is higher than I can fathom.
Would I return to yesterday
If it meant I would forfeit today
I cannot say
For there was sweetness there
Amidst the pain
There was joy with sorrow.
Yet in the eyes of today
There lies more
There is hope for tomorrow.
Tuesday, April 29, 2014
Monday, April 28, 2014
The Games People Play
I find this age of technology interesting indeed. It amazes me that with the tap of a keyboard we can access information about just about anything or anybody we desire. For a little cash you can even buy more information.
Yet, all of this information isn't worth the server you receive it on because it does not allow you to actually experience that thing you are researching first hand, nor does it allow you to know the person you are searching for beyond the sketchy information you can gather.
The internet has been responsible for reuniting countless people and establishing relationships between family members that have longed to meet or know each other. I think that is wonderful and I am sure that so many people have had long dreamed of reunions.
Where this age of information gets difficult is many people are building relationships based on communications established through the internet and using texting as their main way to get to know the other person. While I see nothing wrong with texting, in general, I can also see where it takes away from our ability to effectively communicate face to face, or even over the phone.
And, to top that off, I know for a fact that people have based their opinion of me on what I write here and what they see on places such as facebook. While this is all well and good, this does not give you any idea of who I am or what I stand for, no matter how many cute quotes I have on my pages or how many people I list as friends.
People take this lacking information to formulate a picture in their minds of me or whoever they are watching and then carry this information out to others. It's all so silly to me, but there it is.
It's kind of like reading an article about someone in the public eye and then assuming we know that person when in reality we know nothing at all about them.
I have always tried to be careful with what I say about others mainly because I know that words once spoken cannot be returned. I have regretted speaking something about someone or something that turned out not to be truth and that has caused caution.
You can perceive anything you want about me, but that does not mean that your assumptions are correct, just the same as it would mean with me. I will be the first to admit my own imperfections. I am extremely intimate with my own failings. And, there are many.
I guess what I am trying to say here is if you want to know something about me, ask me. I have nothing to hide.
I am searching and seeking my way, praying that I will be able to move beyond the hurts and mistakes of my life. That is my focus, internal. I don't have time to become involved in all these games that seemingly adult people are playing. I just want to rebuild a life that I can be proud of, that my family can be proud of, and that those I love can be proud of.
And, I will only do that by examining my OWN heart and searching my OWN salvation. I don't have the time or the inclination to become embroiled in the drama of everyone else. I seem to unwittingly find enough for me to deal with.....hahaha
So, here is the deal. I am 47. I have been married once and I have 2 beautiful adult children from that union. Now, I am starting over. I am rebuilding my life and it is the hardest thing I have ever done. I am busy enough doing that. I fully believe if more people would just take responsibility for their own selves the world would be a better place. Let it start with ME, Lord. Help me to be who You would have me to be. Every day. That is the game I am interested in winning.
Yet, all of this information isn't worth the server you receive it on because it does not allow you to actually experience that thing you are researching first hand, nor does it allow you to know the person you are searching for beyond the sketchy information you can gather.
The internet has been responsible for reuniting countless people and establishing relationships between family members that have longed to meet or know each other. I think that is wonderful and I am sure that so many people have had long dreamed of reunions.
Where this age of information gets difficult is many people are building relationships based on communications established through the internet and using texting as their main way to get to know the other person. While I see nothing wrong with texting, in general, I can also see where it takes away from our ability to effectively communicate face to face, or even over the phone.
And, to top that off, I know for a fact that people have based their opinion of me on what I write here and what they see on places such as facebook. While this is all well and good, this does not give you any idea of who I am or what I stand for, no matter how many cute quotes I have on my pages or how many people I list as friends.
People take this lacking information to formulate a picture in their minds of me or whoever they are watching and then carry this information out to others. It's all so silly to me, but there it is.
It's kind of like reading an article about someone in the public eye and then assuming we know that person when in reality we know nothing at all about them.
I have always tried to be careful with what I say about others mainly because I know that words once spoken cannot be returned. I have regretted speaking something about someone or something that turned out not to be truth and that has caused caution.
You can perceive anything you want about me, but that does not mean that your assumptions are correct, just the same as it would mean with me. I will be the first to admit my own imperfections. I am extremely intimate with my own failings. And, there are many.
I guess what I am trying to say here is if you want to know something about me, ask me. I have nothing to hide.
I am searching and seeking my way, praying that I will be able to move beyond the hurts and mistakes of my life. That is my focus, internal. I don't have time to become involved in all these games that seemingly adult people are playing. I just want to rebuild a life that I can be proud of, that my family can be proud of, and that those I love can be proud of.
And, I will only do that by examining my OWN heart and searching my OWN salvation. I don't have the time or the inclination to become embroiled in the drama of everyone else. I seem to unwittingly find enough for me to deal with.....hahaha
So, here is the deal. I am 47. I have been married once and I have 2 beautiful adult children from that union. Now, I am starting over. I am rebuilding my life and it is the hardest thing I have ever done. I am busy enough doing that. I fully believe if more people would just take responsibility for their own selves the world would be a better place. Let it start with ME, Lord. Help me to be who You would have me to be. Every day. That is the game I am interested in winning.
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