Monday, May 25, 2009

Ethan Boulet~~Class of 2009

This day could have had a whole different meaning to us at the Boulet House. When I left my vehicle late in the evening of December 23, 2009 I wasn't sure what our lives would hold. But God was merciful to us. After a few months it is hard to tell he was hit by a truck that night, but I can tell. His life changed that night, as did all of ours.

Thankful does not even begin to explain how we feel to have shared this day together watching Ethan receive his diploma. Amazed, awed, overwhelmed don't do it either.

Congratulations Ethan!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

My Baby Boy

I was sitting in a meeting when suddenly, out of nowhere, I was revisited by your glistening smile, the one that you wore when your teeth were beginning to appear. And I found myself smiling and swallowing back tears that I am quite sure others thought inappropriate to the setting.

But there you were, my big eyed boy, filling the focus of my mind, drawing me back to times long gone.

I have never been able to let that part of you go. Over all the years that have passed, as I watched you transcend from a baby to a big boy to a young man, and now you are standing in the doorway of adulthood. It is so hard to believe.

I have so many dreams wrapped around my heart for you. So many times I have prayed for all the things I wanted for your "someday."

"Prepare him to be a good husband, Lord, one that puts you first. One that loves his wife with a godly, passionate love. Make him a good provider, an example to his children. Let him be a man that prays, always, that loves your Word."

I am selfish. I want to keep you and your sister with me always. But I know that is not what will happen. One day, sooner than I know, you will embark on your destiny. And I will be here, remembering...

Remembering my little big eyes baby boy...

Remembering the laughter...

the tears...

the dreams...

And I will be praying, and expecting...

I want you to never forget, strive to go as far as God wants to take you. Become the man He wants you to be.

Remember to love, to touch, to feel.

Hold onto His promises with both hands...

And NEVER, EVER forget that once upon a time a young woman held tomorrow in her arms, kissed the face of her dreams, and fell in love with a promise.

That love will still be as true when her eyes dim and her memories fade.

That love can still be felt, even when her life here is over.

That love will NEVER, EVER end.

I am so, so proud of you, of who you are. I am most blessed.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Bright Lights, Big City

I am 42 years old, facing the graduation of my youngest child next week, and feeling the years.

When I was a young girl we never really took vacations. We would go visit family. Never in my entire growing up years do I remember us taking a trip, getting a room, sight-seeing, and experiencing new things together. One of the things I wanted to do was make memories with my children.

Denise took off this past weekend and we had planned to go to Atlanta to see the King Tut exhibit. I had seen it when I was about 11 years old when we lived in New Orleans. My mother let us skip school that day and we waited in line FOREVER. That was the first time I ever drank tea from the can.

Bobby also saw the exhibit when he was young, so we thought it would be great to take them since it was leaving Sunday.

But then life started getting in the way, and I decided maybe it would be better for us to stay here. The kids were very disappointed, as I was.

So, early on last week my husband and I began having a conversation about time, the shortness of time and lost opportunities. And during that conversation we decided to embark on a journey.

I searched for a good deal, told the kids the trip was back on, and began the whirlwind of preparations.

Only it wasn't Atlanta we decided on. It was New York.

We finally told the children a few hours before we left.

I have always been afraid of New York, always said that was one place I never wanted to go. I found out that it wasn't that scary at all. We had such a wonderful time. It is huge, bigger than life, unlike anything we had ever experienced before. So much history crammed into the crevices of every street.

We went up in the Empire State Building and stood on the observation deck on the 86th floor, astounded by the city, as far as you could see. We visited Lady Liberty, which made my eyes fill with tears as I remembered my own freedom and what it means to be an American. From the tour of the harbor we caught a glimpse of the site where the Twin Towers once reigned as Kings of the skyline.

There was Greenwich Village, SOHO, NOHO, China Town, Little Italy, Brooklyn and so much more that we did not get to see. A trip back is definitely in order.

We ate real New York Pizza, and hot dogs from the street vendors. We had food from a Deli, and delicious Italian from Little Italy, although we did not see any mobsters that we knew of.

How amazingly different life is there. Cars were luxury items, apartments were more a month than all my bills combined, and I still don't know how they got groceries home.

We experience cab rides that left me with many new gray hairs, and the *wonderful* attitudes of the people that filled the spectrum from polite to down-right rude.

It amazed me that the population of New York is probably more than the entire state of Georgia, yet in all our exploring I saw 4 churches. 4

We were suckered into a comedy show that was horrible. One *Lady* asked me during her routine "You're religious, aren't you?" And she made several comments about being **Free.** When we finally escaped that atmosphere all I could think was "You have no idea what freedom is."

The lights, the sounds, the shows, the stores, all of it was something to behold. But walking the streets of that bright, big city were empty people. It took me hours to realize why some stared at us as we ventured among the crowds, we stood out, or rather the light that was within us did.

When we arrived back in Atlanta we had a late lunch at pf changs, my favorite place to eat. I usually consume all of the fortune cookies and just give each person their fortune. Ethan's was "A visit to a strange place will give you an renewed perspective."

He said, "It sure did. I appreciate Douglas, Georgia."

Me too, me too.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Prison Break

My Pastor spoke of Paul and Silas recently, relating the events prior to their imprisonment by the hands of the masters of the woman who was delivered of the spirit of divination. He spoke of the subsequent beatings they endured just prior to being placed in the inner prison in stocks.

I know we have all heard the story before. He related the importance of prayer before praise as we go forth to reach the lost.

I was moved and inspired as always.

This morning that story came to my mind again as I read a quote from Max Lucado.

"Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free and realizing you were the prisoner!"

There is no inner prison that is harder to break out of than unforgiveness. The stocks of bitterness that can bind your heart will trap you in darkness, preventing you from moving in any direction.

Alexander Pope said "To err is human to forgive divine."

This morning that quote too on a whole new meaning for me. To forgive is divine, is of God.

Therefore your unforgiveness keeps you out of the presence of God, shackled to those feelings of resentment, to remain frozen in place chained to the animosity that you are choosing over forgiveness.

Paul and Silas sat in the depths of prison, beaten, bloody, in pain...but bitter was not mentioned.

The Word of God says that they prayed and then they sang praises and the earth shook and they were freed.

What if part of that prayer was; "God, help me to forgive. Don't allow me to become angry at those that hurt me. I want you to help me reach them."

And then they were able to sing praise to the One who moved in their hearts, removed any hatred or resentment.

Search your own heart today. Are you standing still in God? Do you feel like you are a prisoner to unforgiveness, to bitterness, resentment? Is a past hurt keeping you from your release?

Let me tell you today is the day to break free! This is the hour to bust through the walls of your own self made prison and allow God to heal the wounds that have been inflicted on you!

Meet the One with the key to the door of freedom today in prayer and then shake the foundations of your own prison with PRAISE as He sets you Free!!

Sunday, May 3, 2009

I FLU The Coop!!

As many of you may have noticed there has been an awful lot of attention in the media to the H1N1 flu (formally known as the Swine Flu). We have been focusing on it in my field because of the potential for many of the ones we serve to be affected.

So, the other night I dreamed I was sick. I kept blowing my nose and blowing my nose and it was full of bacon! I could not figure it out until today. I guess I had "Swine Flu!"

I thought that was too funny when it hit me today.

Isn't it strange how something can deeply affect you and you really don't even realize it?

I have been thinking about the situation so much that it was even following me into my sleep.

And, I have noticed that sometimes things in the world can have the same affect. Sometimes we let things creep in to our lives that stick to us, and without even realizing it we begin to dwell on it and it creeps in to other areas, seeps into our thoughts and colors our views.

One instant that comes to mind is women reading romance novels. I love a good clean romance, but if I read too much of them, before long I begin to think "Now why doesn't my husband act like that?" and without even realizing I have done it I may have measured him against someone that doesn't even exist.

And that happens with other things, too. In your job, in your school, maybe even in your walk with God. I have known people that allowed themselves to be influenced by false doctrine and before long it had creeped into their own *beliefs* and colored their views of the Word of God. I have seen whole churches completely give over to worldly beliefs in the name of *winning souls* and without even realizing it has happened they have lost everything.

H1N1 still poses a threat to us here in the U.S. This is a good time to be reminded of prevention, covering your mouth when you cough or sneeze, staying home when you are sick, good hand washing, etc.

And in my field I have to think about things like this to insure the vulnerable population I serve is protected and safe. But, I do hope it doesn't come sneaking into my dreams again. I love bacon, but not up my nose!!

And I love the Lord enough to take inventory, watch out for those things that want to steal my focus, take me off the path, cause me strife and confusion. I want to be listening so that when the Word of God goes forth I will know it is speaking to me and I will be ready to do what ever it takes. I want to get rid of any hindrances before it's too late!

Lord, help me to be ready! I've got to make it, above all else, I have got to be ready.