As I Have Loved You

Last night as I was preparing for bed a song popped into my head. It was a song that transported me back to a time when my very own babies were little, riding in the backseat of the car. I had a cassette tape of songs for them and they knew them all. We would sing them loudly as we traveled the roads of our lives. 

The one that visited me last night went like this:

This is my commandment that you love one another that your joy may be full.

That was basically the whole song. 

And, as it rang out in my mind last night, repeating repetitively I thought, “Hold up. This ain’t right.”

How on earth can my joy be full if I “love” as the world thinks of love?

I saw a man who was basically street preaching. A woman came up to him, who was wearing a ministerial collar, and attacked him because he was speaking against sin. She told him he had it all wrong because the whole message of the gospel was LOVE. 

And, that is correct. 

But, how can I have fullness of joy watching those that I love dying in their sins? Please, explain that to me because I am just not getting it. 

I woke up this morning with those same thoughts, that same song from long ago blasting in my brain. 

So, I went to the Word of God to put some context to this “commandment.”

And, guess what?

It’s not there. 

There is no commandment that says if we love one another our joy may be full. 

John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.

Huh. That is a lot different than the kiddie diddie. 

It looks like they just borrowed part of verse 11 just to make it a little more palatable to the masses. 

John 15:11 These things have I spoken unto you; that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full. 

So, basically the song was a mashup of the two verses, but in doing so, the meaning was lost. Let me explain. We will work backwards for a minute. Just hang with me. 

Verse 10 says “If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in his love. 

There is a lot to unpack here. I am going to come back to this in another blog so I don’t lose you, but it is important to note here that Jesus is speaking to the disciples at the Last Supper, right before the crucifixion. He has already told Judus Iscariot to do what he was going to do quickly. 

But, for the sake of time today, let’s move to verse 13. Now, we have some context. We know Jesus is about to give Himself for us. 

“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”

He goes further in the next verse to say who His friends are: 14 “Ye are my friends, if ye do whatever I command you.”

This is important to note here as well as it puts another spin on us accepting Him as our Savior.

16 Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it to you.

I want to go further into this in another blog, but He has called us to follow His commandments and bear fruit. This is to bring us joy. 

We are to bear fruit and remain in His love. And, this I will cover in another blog, so stay tuned. 

Now, I want to move on to what struck me, and why I know, without a doubt, we cannot love what the world loves. 

John 15:18-19 If the world hate you, ye know it hated me before it hated you. If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you. (eth at the end of hateth is the act of continuing. So the world continually hates you)

Here is where it gets down to it. 

John 15:22 If I had not come and spoken unto them, they had not had sin: but now they have no cloke for their sin.  

When we live our lives before this world that hates us, we expose their sin. They can no longer “hide” and pretend in their hearts that everything is right with them. We rip the cover off of their transgressions. 

This is why this supposed “minister” was so offended by the street preacher exposing that certain lifestyles are sinful. It was, in turn, exposing her sin. And, in this world where we are pushed to accept evil as good, we see this at an increasing rate. 

So, yes we are commanded to love one another, but as He loved us. 

And, how did He love us? He loved us enough to reveal our sin to us, to rip the cover off of our transgressions. He didn’t do this so we could continue in sin. 

As He loved us, I cannot see others in their sinful state and NOT tell them about His salvation, NOT expose their sin, but also NOT pat them on the head and tell them they are okay. 

His LOVE exposes sin so that we are no longer separated from Him. 

As He loved us, I am commanded to do the same. 

I remember telling someone years ago that if you see someone you love standing on the edge of a cliff, you don’t push them away, you draw them closer, and I stand by that. 

But, what if when you extend the love needed to save them from their sinful state, they push you away because they don’t want their sin exposed??

We remember that they are not only rejecting us, but also Christ in us. They rejected Him long before we reached. 

My joy comes from keeping His commandment, to love as He loves. 

So, if I see sin in you, I will expose it. I will pray and I will reach for you. Not out of anything but love. Because I love you like He loves you. That is where my joy is and where it will increase. When I love you as He did, I have to tell you, I have to reach for you. 

And, isn’t that love? Isn’t that why I cautioned my kids not to play in the streets, or talk to strangers? It wasn’t to stifle their will, it was to protect their life, to allow them to grow and prosper. To teach them the difference between right and wrong. To shield them from the world and the things of the world. And what joy I had from showing them the way and helping them grow!

And what joy I have from loving you as He does. I won’t lie and say you are fine because where is the love in that? Where is the joy in knowing you are headed to hell? 

Even if you hate me, I will love you enough. 

I will love you as He did. 

Edit: 7/3/25 I had a beautiful revelation tonight concerning this verse

John 15:22 If I had not come and spoken unto them, they had not had sin: but now they have no cloke for their sin.  

Remember John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God.

John 1:14 says - And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.

So now, let’s take another look at John 15:22 If I had not come and spoken unto them, they had not had sin: but now they have no cloke for their sin. 
Yes, we need to talk to people about their lives, where they are, and what is hindering them (sin), but what an incredible revelation I had tonight. It is the WORD that convicts, right?
Look at these verses. The WORD was made flesh in the Man Jesus. So when He (the Word) spoke to sinners that WORD exposed their sins! 
We have to bring the Word to them. Not our opinions, the Word. That was the point I was making, but I didn’t fully explain for easy understanding because in my head I knew but it may not have been clear to others. Tonight while contemplating this verse it hit me this was a beautiful way to help others understand. ❤️
Why they should change, how they can change, it’s all in the Word!

 

Broken Together

My Pastor preached a timely message tonight regarding “Real Love in a Fake World.” He referenced 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

He stated we live in a world obsessed with love, but it is a shallow love. We are bombarded with “counterfeit connections.”

And, my how true that is.

Long ago a young, naive girl with her head in the clouds walked down the aisle to meet the love of her life. He waited there filled with the desire to build forever, a family, and a promise was made by him, and by her.

We had building blocks of memories and two precious legacies.

But, we were broken. 

I never felt like I was enough. Never. 

And, in the end, I wasn’t. 

I learned a hard and painful lesson about myself. And, I made a mess of my life trying to prove to myself that I was worthy of “love.”

John 13:35 says: By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.

My Pastor pointed out tonight the preposition is “to” not “for” here. For is reciprocal. We are to have love one “to” another meaning we expect nothing in return. 
“To” here suggests direction, flow, or action toward someone else. A love that moves outward.
My Pastor always says LOVE is not a four letter word; it is a ten letter word, commitment. It’s not just a feeling. It’s something shown. And it’s directed toward others, not focused on self. Love is given freely without demanding or expecting something in return.
This is AGAPE love which is what is described in 1 Corinthians 13:1-13.
On our wedding day I asked the pastor to read from 1 Corinthians 13.

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8 Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part. 10 But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away.

11 When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 12 For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.

13 And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

There is a lot going on there and in order to break it down it would need much more than this little blog post, but when I read these words today it is easy to see our failings. IF ONLY we had taken more heed to these words. 

Both of us. 

Would that have prevented our divorce after 26 years? I believe if we had lived those words the entire time it would have. 

But that fake love of the world crept on. Sin crept in. Other people were allowed access to the sacred things of our marriage. And, the hurt of those actions tarnished our union, and broke that little girl.

On my way home tonight I was listening to the songs on Apple Music that I have listened to the most in the last ten years. One of those songs I did not remember when it came on. But, once it started, I remembered well the times I cried to the song.

It’s called Broken Together by Casting Crowns. 

I urge you to listen if you are struggling in your marriage. I think had it come out before I gave up it would have helped me. 

I make no excuses. I am far from perfection, and I well know we are all broken. But, as long as He is in the center, we can be broken together.