Wednesday, June 9, 2010

My Mama

I always thought it unfair, as a child, that I didn't look like my Mama. She was an incredible beauty. Olive skin, beautiful hair, perfect smile.

She had many that tried to win her heart, but only one Daddy.

Growing up, my Mama kept everything as it should be. She worked, she cleaned, she did laundry, and she cooked a meal every night. I was not neglected because she was working, I was blessed because of the balance she always provided.

When I finally married, I remember calling her, crying one night. I just couldn't understand why my house did not stay clean like hers always did. She simply said, "That's because when you go to sleep every night, I stay up and make sure everything is picked up."

When I brought both of my babies home I went straight to her.

And throughout the years there have been few events that I did not want to rush to share with her.

She has been my confidant, my cheerleader, my critic and my friend. And I have done my very best to emulate all she has been to me with my own children.

I just don't know what it will mean....being a motherless child. Even at 43, it was my Mama I wanted when I was sick recently. It was her advise I longed to hear, because I knew she would be straight with me.

And now, just like that, she is gone.

3 months after she lost the love of her life....

My heart is broken. How can I face this lost without my Mama to comfort me?

I don't know what I did to deserve my parents, to deserve the love that they had for me.

Jesus, I need Your comfort right now. I need You....oh, I need You....

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